Some days it is just a big old soap opera around here and I feel like the total failure! It is so hard to daily try to meet all the kids needs for love and education and attention without getting overly frustrated, and then to mix in church activity, and extracurriculars, and playdates with friends, and limit the media usage, and let's not forget about visiting family...man, there are seriously not enough hours in a day! Do you ever go to bed and pray for 2 hours because you just pour your heart out about how to be a good wife and mom, and not ruin your family in the process??? I do! But I tell you the honest truth, without the Lord, I would fall to pieces some days! He is my strength and my rock and the one who guides me and reminds me of what my purpose is. He tells me to slow life down and focus on the important. So if the math gets slighted and dinner is late so we can do some essential character training, it is OK. Sometimes after a rough day, we just decompress at home with a walk or a swim or games, or a family devo instead of Wednesday bible classes. I know we shouldn't skip services, but sometimes we need each other's unity and choose to worship that way, instead of going in separate directions for bible classes. The family as a whole loves it. We are all going so many directions that we need that family togetherness.
So, as I get ready for this homeschooling year I am trying to make sure we do not overschedule our life, especially the evenings, and trying to make sure we cover the necessary curriculum for everyone, which can be a real juggling act when you have a preschooler, a first grader about to learn to read, a struggling reader, a mostly independent worker, and a middle schooler that has heavier coursework. But mostly I am striving to make sure we daily praise the Lord, learn His Word, and bring all our behaviors and choices back to Him. I want that lifestyle to permeate everything, and for the family to be central. I want to spend time with these kids doing the things that need to be done and the things they enjoy. This is our only chance to be with them this often and it is flying by at lightspeed. And fitting in everything is such a challenge. Really, it just can't be done--not by me anyway. Something has to give, and we are going to mess up and miss things, probably some really important things. But with the help and guidance of the Lord, I pray everyone will grow up happy and safe and polite and responsible most of all devoted to God.