Monday, November 26, 2012

Heading Into the Holiday Season

How's your school year going? Ours is moving VERY fast and I am always amazed when time flies. It is going well, though, thank you. Jacob is filming and learning. Emily is writing a book and learning. Elizabeth is learning and enjoying life. Jordan is learning more than schoolwork. Kimberly is growing up. Yeah, that about sums it up. This semester has brought changes. Our piano teacher had her first baby, so lessons are currently suspended. The kids are changing their dance schedule, so that is taking some getting used to. We had an incident with Elizabeth's eye that took 3 doctor visits (who ever had rust in their eye???) And we are getting over our second minor illness that only affected one kid. All in all not too shabby.
It has been a time of learning for me, too. The older I get the more serious I am in my Christian walk, the more knowledgeable about scripture, and the more aware of the extent of my sin and His grace that is offered to cover me. Praise God for that! I am also more aware of how many of my friends who claim Christ are seriously in need of prayer and patience. Mainly because of harsh judging of their fellow Christians trying to walk in Christ. What a stumbling block they have become to me! I must have been just like that often over the past 20 years. Sad. No wonder so many do not want to be Christians. They have to be able to see how we tear each other apart by making the scriptures into our own legal system at the least infraction of what each individual feels is the right thing to do in each situation. We tear each other apart in the heart and soul over things like, our clothing, our birthing, our movies, our celebration of holidays, our music, our use of money, our choice of schoolbooks, our choice of career/schooling, our kids activities. Not that correct behavior isn't very important, but these areas are gray. There are no specifics for the majority of our daily life decisions in the scripture, though many will tell you there are. Very few give their fellow Christian any wiggle room for growth, but instead look down on them, refuse to associate their children with them, refuse to associate at all, bind things that are not binding, etc. It is terribly discouraging, when we are supposed to be a loving people, leading by example and kindness. Often I find more criticism and calling out, than building up and setting examples of grace.
Sin is wrong. No doubt about it. Unrepented  sin, the unsaved, will not by any means get into heaven, but I think there are lots of folks who just might be shocked at those who WILL be there...those exact people they blasted for having a skirt too tight, shirt too see through, not having enough kids, reading a book about wizards,  going to a secular concert,  seeing a movie with foul words, using tobacco, overeating, spending money unwisely.... I am reminded that we need to remove the plank in our own eye before reaching for that speck in our brother's eye...and that those of us without sin should cast the first stone. We all sin, very differently, and fact is, none of us will ever, EVER, attain perfection this side of heaven. I pray that we could stick with the specifics of sins that need to be corrected and give people time for growth in the multitude of gray areas.
So that is my soapbox for today. It has been a long time coming, and I am definitely preaching it to myself, first and foremost, for I am the leader of these sins. Yes, you heard it here. I am not perfect...not even remotely close. But the great thing is that I am daily trying to obey God's word by studying and acting on it. And daily, I am more than thankful for the grace that covers my daily fall.
I pray the rest of this school year ( and everyday life in general) will find all of us showing more and more love toward others, teaching the truth in humility and love, and leading the next generation to Christ. Encourage someone today! Everyone needs to hear those positive words....more than we realize. People need our kindness.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Week 12ish??

Homeschool is going pretty well this year. The kids are progressing very well and more independently than I had dared hope. Kids are making some good decisions on what to study. Piano has been going well, and so has dance and ECD and friendships and filming and youth activities. Not long and we will begin LTC practices. Also, there is a possibility of a film school in january for one of the kids. The latest premiere went very well, too. But the big thing the kids are looking forward to is The Hobbit, which is coming out in December. And since they have no Nutcracker performance for the first time in 4 years, they are free to do other things. I thought I would really miss it, but I am not missing it as much as I thought. I do however miss the adult interaction at the studio. Lots of us are not hanging around anymore during classes so we miss our mom social times. That has been hard. And I haven't had a houseful of kids for a movie in several months due to busy lives...or a carload of filmies...but that may change in a few days. Also, we will have more concentrated family time in a few weeks as Clay takes off from work for an extended period. It has worked very well. Adjustments come, but so far we are rolling right along, happily.
Well, that is all I can write for the moment, for our afternoon is going to be filled with appointments and shopping in Rockwall. And I must get some decent clothes on. Have a blessed day!

Sunday, November 11, 2012


Do you ever just walk through life and feel lost? Feel like you are never doing enough and that time is running away from you and all the important things you want to do seem to never get done?
I feel that a lot. I love my family and I have very high expectations from myself in what I feel I should be accomplishing for them. But I often feel like I am failing because I don't seem to be able to get it all done.
Take tonight. We went to a movie premiere for our oldest son. I largely planned it and decorated and felt like hostess. Therefore I didn't get to do the big things I wish I had done, like visit as much with family and friends. Or take the photos I wanted. I got a few shots but I wanted photos of Jacob with grandparents, and siblings, and his father, and his friends. I wanted a shot of my kids together. I wanted to spend the earlier part of my day getting a picture of my youngest two in their new boots that they were so excited about. I wanted to help the neighbor by making sure we walked his dog. But those things didn't happen and now I feel guilty because the day is gone and it is 2am and I am up feeling guilty about what I wish had happened.
Why is life like that? I want to spend time with family, help the kids navigate childhood and the teen years as they figure out their futures, nurture them each day in the knowledge of Jesus and see them take Him as their saviour...but I more often find myself mired in the daily tasks, sometimes even neglecting a solid prayer life and solid bible time each day in favor of just trying to keep my head above water.
Then I am up in the night making lists of what God needs me to be doing so I can start fresh the next day. And hopefully not feel like so much of a failure toward my family. So tonight I made my list, have plans to get back to my prayer list each day, have plans to talk to the kids tomorrow about some important things and getting back on track,  plans to accomplish things that are for His glory in our lives.
I think so much feels lost lately due to the recent elections here in America. Our leader is not a man I trust or believe in, and he is shaping policies for our lives and our futures, largely against my will. Also, the kids are growing...all five of them. They all have interests and friends and talents and needs, and I want to be what a mother is supposed to be for them in each area. It is hard and demanding. Everyone of them cannot get all of me that they need. I cannot do for each of them everything I need to do or want to do. And in all this I cannot forget my husband, who is quiet and hardworking and tired at the end of the day. Yet he slips through the cracks sometimes. How do I fix this?
I have to just do my best to focus on the needs of each day and try to plan for the future. So much goes on and we have to decide what to say NO to. And stick to it. And help the kids realize that they can't do it all either. The people in our lives are of prime importance and they have to be given time and love. God has to occupy our heart for this to happen well. God has to be our center, and we have to maintain that relationship first. It is so easy to get caught up in the day to day things that we reduce our devotion to God and our loved ones to a daily task. Our Christian walk with God should never be a daily task, and neither should the relationships in our lives. Husbands, children, parents, ...they are so important and yet often they aren't honored as they should be.
So tomorrow I plan to share this post with my family and to try to get back on the right path, first with my God, and second with my family. It takes effort every day and saying NO to the distractions we think are so important. They aren't that important. People and God are. Keep God first for He will never, NEVER, leave you. And do NOT neglect your family and those you love, for those you negelct may suddenly not be in your life and you will regret not paying attention to those relationships, and they may never be able to be fixed.